Did i tell you guys about time time i was on price is right?
It was my lifelong dream to be on the price is right, the girl i lived with at the time knew this and somehow got tickets for 4 and asked me to go with her and two of her friends. Now, the reason it was so hard to get in the audience for this show was that the producers had some kind of kickback deal with tour operators who'd bring in 5 busloads of people every taping, the operators would then charge like $100 to get on one of these busses, for which the waiting list was too long to even consider.
Now, i'll paint the picture of the audience for you...
it was about 100 crazed italian females raging from 18 to 97, a 6'4" normal looking guy (me) and two blonde girls who work full time as promo models (her friends) and a loony looking girl with an infectious giggle (my house mate)
I'm looking around and seeing the complete lack of men and thinking i'm a sure thing to get called out. So much so that when it was my turn for the per interview i just acted normal and didn't lie or anything. Meanwhile my housemate is telling some producer baiting story about once owning a camel and the two blondes are thrusting tits in the direction of the 21yo male producer.
They begin the first show (they tape 10 on one day) and my housemate gets called up first off the bat, i'm shattered and annoyed it's not me but i put on a brave face and sit through her completely embarrassing herself by not getting off contestants row for the entire show.
They tape the second one and my blonde friend with the fake tits, yup, first called up and yup, stumles her way through the entire show bidding $976 for a toaster or whatever and never getting off contestants row. I'm furious by now as i've spent the last decade of my life perfecting strategical ideas and dreaming of making an 8 foot put for the car and now i'm watching my friends repeatedly fail when given the opportunity i've been dreaming of. I've also been sitting in the quite hot studio for about an hour and a half. So the anger is building. I'm also considering angry i was so stupid as to go with two girls with fake tits and a girl that had a camel as a pet.
We tape about 4 more shows without incident, have a break and then the other girl i came with gets called up, i'm so angry by this point that shes goes to hug in the standard celebration all price is right contestants do when called up and i just blank her and stare straight ahead. She does get off contestants row and loses the race game to miss out on a TV.
Now it gets up to the last show and the girls are sensing i'm furious at them and they're trying to calm me down and promising to come again and then BOOM, I'm the last contestant of the entire day, it's like everything good i've ever experienced happening all at the exact same instant, i get down to contestants row and I introduce myself. At this point winning the showcase and then spending the night in the spa i've won in a ecstasy fueled sex orgy with the models on the show is all that is flashing through my head. I've never been more confident of something, ever. Then, the thing we're bidding on comes through the curtains. It is a stereo system, THE EXACT STEREO SYSTEM I BROUGHT NOT 2 WEEKS EARLIER. Fireworks are going off in my head, i have an erection under the podium thing. I'm a certain to win everything. I bid the RRP of the stereo which i 100% know is $350 minus $10 for leeway. Then my heart breaks, this 97yo Italian granny next to me bids $341, at the exact point after she says that i let out a "you fucking cunt" which stops filming, i'm then surrounded by producers abusing me for swearing at a little old lady and i'm getting booed from the audience. They then begin filming again, which gives the old Italian bitch another opportunity to $1 me, to which the entire crowd cheers her for because they've turned on me for abusing her. She of course has the best bid and goes on to win a Fijian holiday and a shot at the showcase.
I then have to go through the humiliation of modeling the price is right tshirts and hats they give you if you don't get off contestants row. I then stormed out of the studio while they were taping the showcase leaving the 3 girls i came with there. They get home like an hour or two after me and all three of them start abusing me for leaving them without money or a car (their purses were in the car, lolz)
That's the story of when i was on The Price is Right.
Did i tell you guys about time time i was on price is right?
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